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Manners Matter: Wedding Invitation Etiquette

Manners are important no matter where you go in this world. You can hardly go anywhere without some type of etiquette dictating your behavior. Manners extend into all aspects of your life, including your wedding day. You might be aware that there are certain rules that are traditionally followed at a wedding. But did you know that there is such a thing as wedding invitation etiquette as well? It is important to follow wedding invitation etiquette to avoid insulting a guest, and to avoid publicly embarrassing yourself as well. To make sure that your wedding day is a happy day for everyone, make sure to follow wedding invitation etiquette.

Perfect Timing

Timing is a crucial aspect of wedding invitation etiquette. It is important that both wedding and bridal shower invitations are sent at least eight weeks in advance to the respective event. Eight weeks is a good number because it is early enough for people to clear their schedules, but it is not so early that they forget about your wedding by the time the big day rolls around. Some couples choose to send a “Save the Date” notice soon after their engagement to inform guests only of the date of the wedding, and then send invitations later. You should not send reminders after you send your wedding invitations; this is considered bad wedding invitation etiquette.

A Personal Touch

One of the worst mistakes you can make is using adhesive labels to address your wedding invitations—this is considered very tacky! If you cannot afford to have a calligrapher address your invitations, then you should address them by hand yourself.

Money and Gifts

Money and gifts is a major subject of controversy within wedding invitation etiquette. Information regarding where you are registered should only be included in the bridal shower invitation—this information should never be included on the wedding invitation itself. Also, you should never request money instead of gifts, whether you wish to do so on your wedding invitation, your bridal shower invitation, or by word of mouth. This is not only rude, but it is also considered tacky to request money in lieu of gifts. Your wedding invitation should be a request for presence, not presents.

All in the Details

Although traditional wedding invitation etiquette states that you should not refer to the expected attire of your wedding, this practice is somewhat outdated. Many guests would appreciate an indication of how to dress, if it is tactfully done. Some phrases you could use include: black tie, semi-formal, black tie optional, dressy casual, informal, cocktail attire, or festive attire. Some couples prefer not to have children at their wedding reception. If this is the case, it is better wedding invitation etiquette to write Adult Reception as opposed to writing No Children.

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